Sunday, June 12, 2011

Coffee Time Revelations

My niece stopped by for coffee today, something Capt and I always enjoy, as she's an intelligent and insightful young woman. My favorite part of our chats is that I always come away thinking about things.

This time, among the many ideas thrown around, we realized that she and I had both come to a similar revelation as of late. She verified my forming theory that people are highly unobservant when it comes to the details of others. That last 5 lbs that seems so necessary to lose would go largely unnoticed by those whose opinions matter the most. Not because they don't care enough to pay attention, but because they care about you for who you are, not what you way. Those on the extreme ends of the spectrum (supper-skinny and morbidly obese) may get some attention to the matter, but the rest of us fall in the middle and would all blend together.

She informed me that she quit wearing makeup for an entire term and her own boyfriend never said a word (keeping in mind that she has lovely skin to begin with). I talked to Capt. and he had no idea that I have three different levels of makeup that I use depending on the occasion, to him it all looks the same.

It seems so easy to get caught up in our own flaws, a problem I think all women (and men too) must face. I find myself scrubbing, exfoliating and covering every little blemish, but to what end? If people don't even notice, that means I'm doing it for myself.

How freeing is this revelation?!?! Not only does it free me from extra work on my appearance (though I think again the extremes of really made up and totally slob are still noticed) but it also allows me to stop expecting others to notice any of these things. Instead of waiting for someone to comment on my hair cut and possibly being disappointed, I can just say, "Just got my hair cut, what do ya think?" This makes life easier on everyone!!

Again with the lower of expectations and an increasing of happiness, seems to be a common theme for my revelations. :D Gotta love coffee time!


  1. Coffee time sounds nice.
    I tried out the theory by wearing shorts in public today...and no one ran screaming or pointed and laughed. Does that count toward freeing oneself? :D

  2. Always remember that the degree of happiness one feels is inversely proportional to the expectations one sets. In other words, to be happier, expect less.

  3. Ooooh, coffee. Now that's the important stuff in life! There's something to be said for grooming for oneself. Personally, I figure I'm hopeless. However, I do put on makeup so as not to be visually assaultive and to avoid frightening small children.